on the go...

Usually I would be wiped out from a day on the go with 3 kids in tow. Spent well over an hour at Walmart with Maddie (darn those toy aisles, she was very good, just a struggle to keep her moving on and not playing with everything in sight!). After that, we stopped home to grab a few things, and went to pick up the kids from school. Usually they take the bus, but Cal had a Dr. appt. to check his finger one last time. So we took the "long" drive (funny how now that I live "out in the sticks", everything seems further away!) to the 30th and Layton area. We waited quite a while for the Dr--but the finger seems to be healed, he can resume gym and play but needs to tape the fingers together for a few weeks to avoid another injury. After the doctor, we went to eat at Noodles & Company. Usually we vote or I pick, but Kaycey let Cal pick because he went to the doctor (even though he didn't have to endure any shots or pain!) After eating, we went to the Learning Shop, and holy cow! We were in there for an hour and a half. The kids absolutely loved it. The kids play school all the time (Maddie the student usually, and Cal and Kaycey the teachers) so they really thought all the real teacher stuff in there was so cool! Cal found books he wants to ask Santa for. He said all he wants are books. Wow, can't argue with that! So while shopping for cousins, I managed to sneak in an encyclopedia Cal thought was awesome. And I bought a set of report cards, etc. meant for playing school for the three kids to share. After the shopping trip, we stopped at McD's for a potty break, and then had to deliver movie tickets to someone who lived near Mayfair. We didn't get home till almost 8, but the kids were so well behaved it didn't matter.

Onto a more somber note...so I started my post with how I'd usually be exhausted from the in and out with 3 kids around this time of year...but today I am glad I kept busy. I needed it to keep my mind off of things. I routinely check up on fellow kids we met at Children's Hosp. diagnosed with Stage IV NB (same cancer as Kaycey), or on other kids we hear about & get links to their blogs or care pages (a site set up just for parents to blog to keep family & friends informed). I try not to check up too often because then I get really down (I can name only a handful of kids out of way too many who haven't relapsed or earned their wings, as we prefer to call it). I met Jack just after Kaycey got released after her long stay for transplant. He had just been diagnosed, and his mom wanted to talk to a mom who had been through it all. I met with her a couple times. He since had relapsed a little over a year ago, but was treated & given the NED (no evidence of disease). Well, they found out yesterday he relapsed again. For those who don't know much about this cancer, Kaycey is literally a walking miracle. Statistics say approximately 325 children a year in the U.S. are diagnosed with stage 4 neuroblastoma (worst of 4 stages)-- about 25% survive. The five year survival rate for high risk kids is 30%.Then there are factors that decrease the chances even more--for every additional poor factor (amplified MYCN gene, unfavorable histology for example), we fell into that worst case scenario. I know, silly of me to dwell on things when things are "normal" now. But with all the kids relasping and earning their wings all around us because of this monster of a disease, it is such a reality check, that we are never out of the woods, and never will be, and while I always worry, every ache, every pain Kaycey has worries me, I worry 1000x more after reading the heartwrenching posts, like the one about Jack today. All day I felt as if I had a bowling ball in my stomach, and still do. So I am so thankful the kids kept me busy all evening, I hardly had a moment to think about it all until now.